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The girl on the left

 

me 1

I want to tell you a story about the girl on the left and the right…

Exactly a year ago the girl on the left was fast approaching 39 and had been overweight her whole adult life, had a rubbish relationship with food using it to manage stress and img_5220anxiety, to reward and punish herself. She really did not believe that she would ever be ‘thin,’ but decided that she definitely didn’t want to be as big as she was any more.

img_5266With the support of her best friend she walked through the slimming world door on the 15th January 2017 and decided she would give it a try. No expectations did she have other than she wanted to be smaller. She did not want to know how much she weighed. The thought of never eating a whole packet of biscuits, a whole bar of chocolate or 7 glasses of gin at once again genuinely terrified her. She really didn’t think loosing weight was possible.

She put her trust in her group consultant, and took each day as it came. Never looking past tomorrow and doing the best she could each day. There were good days and bad days, days where it was easy and days which were incredibly hard. Anxiety was high as she began to find new ways to manage anxiety, fuel herself and learn how to cook, all whilst juggling a home, family and full time job.

Week after week she came and stood on the scales, never knowing the number but knowing that the pounds were coming off. Before she knew it she has lost 2 and a half stone and her clothes were beginning to get too big. img_7070Still no target did she set and still not did she dare to think or even dream that she could maintain this. When people told her she was doing brilliantly she felt ashamed and worried she wouldn’t and couldn’t sustain it. She felt unworthy of the praise because she should not have got that big to begin with. It was her own fault she was overweight and could blame no one but herself. Despite slim 3these feelings she began to see the changes and began to be kinder to herself. She looked in her book and saw what she weighed and while it was more than she thought, it was surprisingly ok. She felt that she might be able to see a light at the end of a very long tunnel.

As the months rolled past she grew in confidence and strength and when awarded her 5 stone award after just 29 weeks she felt strangely proud. A feeling she had not often let herself experience. img_0771As she sat in the plane seat waiting to take off for her family holiday and the belt went round her twice, she had a sudden realization of what she had done. When she jumped in the pool with the kids in a bikini (yes a bikini- who even thought that would be possible!!!!) she felt joy and love like she had not experienced for many a year. She ate and drank and had a wonderful time. Slightly anxious about the scales on return but feeling more in control than ever around food. She ate ice cream and cake (in moderation!) and chose to run in the sunshine and walk in the rain!

me and mimaStanding on the scales on return the 3.5lb gain was nothing and a few weeks back on plan quickly forgotten. A target was finally set and by September the girl on the left was disappearing and becoming a distant memory. As she approached 40 she had never felt more at ease with herself and proud of what she was doing and the girl on the right began to emerge.

The girl on the right turned 40 in mid-October and smiled a genuine smile the whole weekend. She drank gin and ate cake and could see that anything was possible… img_2623even her target weight which whilst so close felt majorly out of reach. She had not been that small for 22 years and people around her told her she had done enough. and needed to loose no more. But the girl had emerged and the girl on the right was stronger and the girl on the right had grown in confidence to know that anything was possible if you believed. The girl on the right wanted to be a healthy weight for her height so she didn’t listen to the doubters even the doubting voice in her head was weak and she pushed on and kept fighting and visualised the impossible dream!

In the first week of December the girl on the right got to target. 6 stone lighter than 47 slim 2weeks before and the girl on the right was telling people that they too could do what she had done. And when they told her that she was inspiring, instead of shrinking and wanting to disappear, she embraced it and thanked them and held her head high at her achievement and hard work. For after all it was hard work, it wasn’t always easy despite what slim 5people thought they saw, but one of the best decision she ever made was to walk through those slimming world doors. the girl on the left prioritised herself and whilst she couldn’t see the girl on the right at the beginning she didn’t need to because her consultant could and she trusted her consultant!

The girl on the left is still there and I will love her for evermore. For she got me through tricky times, protected me, taught me all I know and made me who I am today, but the girl on the right is my best version and who I am supposed to be. The girlme 2 in my dreams I have made, happy and healthy that’s me. My only regret is that I did not walk through the doors sooner  because I’m telling you since I walked through those doors I have not looked back. If I can do it you can do it too… I’m just asking you to take a chance and believe… because miracles happen all the time and who knows what you could achieve…

Please read the … Small print… which should actually be large print… the above was possible and achieved because I worked really hard and I made the decision I wanted to loose weight more than I wanted to eat chocolate and gin but also because I was supported by 2 Kim’s, by the second names of Street and Fry and the wonderful team of Rees’. On the left my tribe and on the right chief washer upperer! (a very important job in this house when the cook is dyslexic, cant follow a recipe, likes to use every single saucepan and utensil available and is VERY VERY unorganised and messy!)

 

 

 

 

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